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"it is time to live simply, so that others can simply live"

GP essay kinda sucked. i had no idea on what to write.
i really think i went out of point and im gna flunk this one pretty badly.
GP compre was less merciful. global warming.
i loved the AQ. i had sooooo much to write about. weehooo.
it pays to revise.


bibi didnt dare looking at me at all now.
i know she's not brave enough! haah.
its cool that my guys gave her a nickname(x
kinda funny but at e same time, insulting.


life has been just about studyinnnnnnnng.
even yestd.
had a study date w izzat that ended up in KK hospital.
akmals warded there.
hes okay now thot he still needs to use e inhaler.
its so hard to study in a place where e kids scream and cry at e top of their voices!

there's this annoying boy here whos soooooo RUDE. i swear, if i cud id slap his face.
stole my zikris toys. [and now, annoying me w his 'pls. u so selfish!']

anyway, gave up at ard 430.
windowshopped at bugis junction.
omg. i got sooooooo bloody thirsty.
i walked alot and to add to that, i had to layan izzats non-stop talking.
he talks soooooooo much sia. gosh.

>>>>>>> fast forward.

took e busy train to bedok.
i was okay if it was just packed but i had to tolerate the stench of someone's ketiak.
OMFG. i couldnt take it sia!
i cudve changed places w izzat but it was too crowded so i just hadto live w it.
ALL E WAY to bedok!! haii.
eeeeww. i can still smell it. brr.

>>>>>>> fast forward.

reachd grannys place just to discover that my makcik saw me walking w izzat.
and as u know, EVERYONE went 'hoohoo!' 'waaaaaah.'
including my granny.
'alaaaaah. kawan lelaki tu boyfren la. asal tak ajak yun pnye kawan buke kat siniii'
i think they cant wait to marry me off tauu. dush.

after buke,
went down to e fitness corner to teman my lil sisters and cousins.
wanted to join in e exercise but ended up lying on e bench and sleeping like a bangla!
wakakakaka.
fun giler ah!
but i got critisized by my 8yr old cousin.
(x



so yeah..
that was my interesting day yestd.
finished revising my physical geography but reading it thru again
just in case...
ok dahdah.
bye(:

p.s. for another year, im working as an unpaid nurse((x



i was peacefully doing my revision,
chatting with some friends and watching videos during breaks.
and suddenly i got msg.
i got abit surprised cos i remembered doing nothing of sucha thing stated on the msg.
and so i questioned.
the debate became intensed.
then suddenly the person brought in a past incident as a proof that i was, in fact, a LIAR.
and straight away i was like, WTF!
anybody can call me a liar if they have fullproof.
but this... its not even fucking true!
sth happened and he ASSUMED things.
fucking idiot doesnt even know what he's talking about.
i felt humiliated. fucktard.
he ought to be ashamed of himself.
talking about shit that is not even the least true.
he's asking for a tight slap on e face.

fucking idiot,
FUCK OFF!
ure still sucha pain in e ass.







I HAVE A NEW PHONE!!
(:

MOTORAZR V6.


wahoooooooooooooooo!
ok dah.



ramadhan sudah menjelang..
but it doesnt feel like it. at all.


im all stressed up.
conditions at home dont do any help at it.
aggravating my stress level lagi ader uh.
i have to study for my promos.
i have to do well for my subsequent flights.
i have to take care of my brother cos i believe no one can give him e best knowledge. he's very susceptible to bad examples at home. and i guess im e only one responsible enough to correct him. after all, he's still so innocent and young.
i have to tolerate my bad condition. hmm. im not ill. but there will come a time in e day where i'll cough profusely to an extent that i'll tear or vomit.
i need to save up money to pay up the debt i owe my dad because of my phone bill. but i'll still need another amount of money for my new zealand trip and for my new prepaid card that i feel i have to purchase on my own because my dad is just a bloody selfish ass like my mom.


its hard living w those two people.
yeah sure. they're cool.
they're liberal unlike some muslim parents.
i can come home late.
i can bring guys to my house.
i can go out w guys, for all they care.
they dont force me to wear conservative clothes.
heck! i can even skip prayers if i want to.
but unfortunately, it comes w a cost.
they dont care much about their children, or atleast, the big ones.
sometimes they try to show that they actually do, but u can really see just how much they truly dont care.
they pour all their love and respect to e small ones but throw vulgarities and humiliating words to e older ones. [thats why i need to take care of my lil bro]
they dont really care about our education. wait. they do. but they only look at e results.
and if u fail to give them what they want, they'll curse us upside down. saying that we dont put enough effort or always watching e tv or just plain stupid.
and guess what, they do NOTHING to help us. yes. they'll watch tv loudly during our exam period and force us to do our work while doing that. [see why i rather stay up late in school?]
in simple words, they dont give a shit but they want us to do well in our studies. hmmm?
oh.. lets add one more.
my mom can scream like tarzan and jane!
she can be reaaaaaaally irrational sometimes which always leads to a quarrel w me bcos i just refuse to be blamed or put at e wrong when i know im really right.

ok. i betta be off.
this is something i dont tell people.
but i believe ure a bunch of ppl i can trust?
love ya'll!



its been quite some time since i hung out with those ppl i love hanging out with.
god knows how much i miss them. seriously.
and so.. i take this oppurtunity let it be known.


first and formost,
eja
okay. i believe there's only a 20% chance that ure gna read this but what e heck. imma tell u once im done with this post. anyway, i miss u, friend. period. ure one of my oldest friend close friend. 8 years of friendship and counting. thats really some shit! i know we've been really busy with our own lives. its hard to meet up sometimes. but those once-in-a-blue-moon occasions when u'd sms and invite me for a cup of ice cream at macs or just come down to accompany u buy stuffS at tmart, i really treasure them. its never easy keeping a relationship strong and tight, right? but i guess, with u, its the worth the while. anyway, i just wna say that i really miss u and i hope we could meet one day again to have another talk about everything under the sun-from boys to schools to family to girlwirly stuffs. haha. i love u, darling! dont ever forget that. oH! maybe we could go out to break fast together like old times. ramadan is coming. happy fasting(:

saint dynn
yes! i miss u too. apparently, i dont think u do too. uve been so busy with... wateva ure busy with and we never had the chance to hang out together nimore. and yeah, i gotta agree with u about u feeeling weird now but it shouldnt be that bad right? ive felt the distance between us, further than ever now. and its really saddening to know that its actually happening. u were one of the first friends i made in tpjc. ok fine, maybe it didnt start out well. haha. but subsequently, ive grown close to u UNINTENTIONALLY and UNEXPECTEDLY. kan kan? i miss that crazy dynn. i got too used to ur irritations that life seemed quite naked without them. and err.. i have to admit, i do miss ur annoying-ness. dahdah. i dont wna get all emotional about this! cya soon if i do. btw, i know this wont change the situation. i just wanted u to know. mhmm.

ayn
i read your blog post. u sounded sooooo like me, do u know that? DOMINANT babies ah. (x haha. anyway, im here to offer u my shoulders and lend u my ears. i might not be one of many of ur closest friends but i thought i shud give it a try. i thot that we are somewhat alike so its easier to connect or some sort like that. and i guess, i get really worried when my frens get all sad and down. who doesnt, kan? haha. i just wna let u know that im always here. if not me, there are sooo many others out there that love and care for u. they'd do almost anything to make things right for u. serious. so, what im trying to say, is that its okay sometimes to open up to others. to feel vulnerable in front of those who care for u. just cry it out. its never easy to box all ur emotions up. but its also never easy to let it out, right? i know too. haha. but what i learnt is that sometimes, it feels reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally good [and i really mean it, really good] to tell someone about it. and that someone just listening to ur every cry, hugging u close and wiping ur tears dry. he/she might not give the best advice but knowing that they're there for u is enough to give u the greatest comfort. (: so i think u shud give it a try.
oh! and yarhh.. i miss u too. DUUHH!


hannah
i just miss everything about u. i miss hanging out with u. i miss listening to all ur craps and then get bored of it. haha. heck, i miss YOU! seriously serious tau. i wished we had more time the other day but im a busy woman, kan? wattado. (x i sayang u, giler babi ah! ure one of the most sincere friend ive ever had. and i dont wna let u go just yet. u can be all annoying and irritating and everything related to that but its never too much. i guess its because ur friendship is worth tolerating them. i miss those times we wud gossip about teachers and boys. non-stop ah! hahaha. oh. and those most random things we wud do just to pass the time. ok. i cannot really rmb one specific one. oops! anyway, u might live sooooooooo near me and yet we hardly meet up. sheeshk! when we look back, we shall blame jc for this. garff. stay hannah ok! dont ever change. rmb! DONT. haha. ure the crappiest, most nonsensical, happy-go-lucky friend i have! plus.. ure signature laughter, i cannot forget, man! keep on dancing, princess gonzuella banana hammick(?).



and i love u all sooooooooo much tauu!
<33
god bless you 'ol.



today
three two and half hours of physics tutorial was aite.
but thats not what im writing here for.
found out that there was a youth seminar in school that involved ALOT of malay ppl from different schools. so i looked through e list.

.
.
.
Nur Farah Binte Abdul Jaafar
Nursyafiqah Binte Mohd Ramlee

*HUGE smile*

called up farah and asked where she was.
omg! when she came down those stairs, my face lit up.
i gave e tightest hug and loudest scream.
then it was syaf cute.
i thot that was that.
then syai called me from behind and i was like 'AAAAAAAAHH!'
another tight hug.
i swear it was one of my happiest moments recently when i saw those familiar faces.


spent the afternoon together.
didnt do much sharing.
we need a proper outing. seriously.
took stupid pictures instead.
will post em up soon.

i cud cry thinking of all those times we spent together.
e kambengs. just e kambengs.
i miss them too much.
seriously, i dont mind leaving what i have now just to relive those memories.
i think its a good trade.
[:

sunday
snow city. i was e selit. i swear, i thot there were more of those OUTSIDE e clique. haii.
but it was much fun(:
oh. it wasnt a just-for-fun outing. to celebrate fir's bday.

reached granny's place almost ten, only to study for 10mins and it was straight to bed!

...


friday
skipped school. met my dear boyfriend in e morning then left to meet e other tpjc-tkgians who also skipped school on that day. i was sooooo excited!
okay. imma cut to e chase.
i saw sooo many familiar effeminate faces.
those of which i missed sooo much.
joanne, shujie, sijie, melissa, chermaine, wee ling, hwee ling, vera, hannah, may, sam, kirstie, mas, farzana, josephine & the list goes on.
not forgetting e teachers - ms tee, mrs tong, mrs loy, ms terry,mdm azizan...
;its heartwarming to know that they still remember me.
ms tee- so what are u in now, yuni? model ah.
(x suuuuuuuuuuure.

i didnt wna let go of the hugs.
i didnt wna stop talking.
i didnt wna stop listening to those lovely voices.
i didnt wna leave them.
i wanted to stop time.

may, she had the greatest impact on me.
ran to me and hugged me so long i got scared for a while.
and i saw those tears running down her cheeks.
i didnt know how much i missed u until i saw u. omg yuni. i miss u so much.
yeah. i missed her too. i think she's enjoying her life.
we talked but it wasnt enuff.

cudnt go out with my girls later on cos i had flight):
so i bade goodbye.
and may ran to me and hugged me.
she even left me a kiss.
that was seriously unexpected.
just goes to show how much we missed the old times.
*sigh*
i was downcasted, i didnt wna leave.

later that night...
discussion at al-ansar.
syafiq and farid had a good laugh.
shall not talk about it.
i hope its not on youtube. /=


thursday

happy 1st month, boyfriend.
((:

"it is time to live simply, so that others can simply live"

GP essay kinda sucked. i had no idea on what to write.
i really think i went out of point and im gna flunk this one pretty badly.
GP compre was less merciful. global warming.
i loved the AQ. i had sooooo much to write about. weehooo.
it pays to revise.


bibi didnt dare looking at me at all now.
i know she's not brave enough! haah.
its cool that my guys gave her a nickname(x
kinda funny but at e same time, insulting.


life has been just about studyinnnnnnnng.
even yestd.
had a study date w izzat that ended up in KK hospital.
akmals warded there.
hes okay now thot he still needs to use e inhaler.
its so hard to study in a place where e kids scream and cry at e top of their voices!

there's this annoying boy here whos soooooo RUDE. i swear, if i cud id slap his face.
stole my zikris toys. [and now, annoying me w his 'pls. u so selfish!']

anyway, gave up at ard 430.
windowshopped at bugis junction.
omg. i got sooooooo bloody thirsty.
i walked alot and to add to that, i had to layan izzats non-stop talking.
he talks soooooooo much sia. gosh.

>>>>>>> fast forward.

took e busy train to bedok.
i was okay if it was just packed but i had to tolerate the stench of someone's ketiak.
OMFG. i couldnt take it sia!
i cudve changed places w izzat but it was too crowded so i just hadto live w it.
ALL E WAY to bedok!! haii.
eeeeww. i can still smell it. brr.

>>>>>>> fast forward.

reachd grannys place just to discover that my makcik saw me walking w izzat.
and as u know, EVERYONE went 'hoohoo!' 'waaaaaah.'
including my granny.
'alaaaaah. kawan lelaki tu boyfren la. asal tak ajak yun pnye kawan buke kat siniii'
i think they cant wait to marry me off tauu. dush.

after buke,
went down to e fitness corner to teman my lil sisters and cousins.
wanted to join in e exercise but ended up lying on e bench and sleeping like a bangla!
wakakakaka.
fun giler ah!
but i got critisized by my 8yr old cousin.
(x



so yeah..
that was my interesting day yestd.
finished revising my physical geography but reading it thru again
just in case...
ok dahdah.
bye(:

p.s. for another year, im working as an unpaid nurse((x


i was peacefully doing my revision,
chatting with some friends and watching videos during breaks.
and suddenly i got msg.
i got abit surprised cos i remembered doing nothing of sucha thing stated on the msg.
and so i questioned.
the debate became intensed.
then suddenly the person brought in a past incident as a proof that i was, in fact, a LIAR.
and straight away i was like, WTF!
anybody can call me a liar if they have fullproof.
but this... its not even fucking true!
sth happened and he ASSUMED things.
fucking idiot doesnt even know what he's talking about.
i felt humiliated. fucktard.
he ought to be ashamed of himself.
talking about shit that is not even the least true.
he's asking for a tight slap on e face.

fucking idiot,
FUCK OFF!
ure still sucha pain in e ass.





I HAVE A NEW PHONE!!
(:

MOTORAZR V6.


wahoooooooooooooooo!
ok dah.


ramadhan sudah menjelang..
but it doesnt feel like it. at all.


im all stressed up.
conditions at home dont do any help at it.
aggravating my stress level lagi ader uh.
i have to study for my promos.
i have to do well for my subsequent flights.
i have to take care of my brother cos i believe no one can give him e best knowledge. he's very susceptible to bad examples at home. and i guess im e only one responsible enough to correct him. after all, he's still so innocent and young.
i have to tolerate my bad condition. hmm. im not ill. but there will come a time in e day where i'll cough profusely to an extent that i'll tear or vomit.
i need to save up money to pay up the debt i owe my dad because of my phone bill. but i'll still need another amount of money for my new zealand trip and for my new prepaid card that i feel i have to purchase on my own because my dad is just a bloody selfish ass like my mom.


its hard living w those two people.
yeah sure. they're cool.
they're liberal unlike some muslim parents.
i can come home late.
i can bring guys to my house.
i can go out w guys, for all they care.
they dont force me to wear conservative clothes.
heck! i can even skip prayers if i want to.
but unfortunately, it comes w a cost.
they dont care much about their children, or atleast, the big ones.
sometimes they try to show that they actually do, but u can really see just how much they truly dont care.
they pour all their love and respect to e small ones but throw vulgarities and humiliating words to e older ones. [thats why i need to take care of my lil bro]
they dont really care about our education. wait. they do. but they only look at e results.
and if u fail to give them what they want, they'll curse us upside down. saying that we dont put enough effort or always watching e tv or just plain stupid.
and guess what, they do NOTHING to help us. yes. they'll watch tv loudly during our exam period and force us to do our work while doing that. [see why i rather stay up late in school?]
in simple words, they dont give a shit but they want us to do well in our studies. hmmm?
oh.. lets add one more.
my mom can scream like tarzan and jane!
she can be reaaaaaaally irrational sometimes which always leads to a quarrel w me bcos i just refuse to be blamed or put at e wrong when i know im really right.

ok. i betta be off.
this is something i dont tell people.
but i believe ure a bunch of ppl i can trust?
love ya'll!


its been quite some time since i hung out with those ppl i love hanging out with.
god knows how much i miss them. seriously.
and so.. i take this oppurtunity let it be known.


first and formost,
eja
okay. i believe there's only a 20% chance that ure gna read this but what e heck. imma tell u once im done with this post. anyway, i miss u, friend. period. ure one of my oldest friend close friend. 8 years of friendship and counting. thats really some shit! i know we've been really busy with our own lives. its hard to meet up sometimes. but those once-in-a-blue-moon occasions when u'd sms and invite me for a cup of ice cream at macs or just come down to accompany u buy stuffS at tmart, i really treasure them. its never easy keeping a relationship strong and tight, right? but i guess, with u, its the worth the while. anyway, i just wna say that i really miss u and i hope we could meet one day again to have another talk about everything under the sun-from boys to schools to family to girlwirly stuffs. haha. i love u, darling! dont ever forget that. oH! maybe we could go out to break fast together like old times. ramadan is coming. happy fasting(:

saint dynn
yes! i miss u too. apparently, i dont think u do too. uve been so busy with... wateva ure busy with and we never had the chance to hang out together nimore. and yeah, i gotta agree with u about u feeeling weird now but it shouldnt be that bad right? ive felt the distance between us, further than ever now. and its really saddening to know that its actually happening. u were one of the first friends i made in tpjc. ok fine, maybe it didnt start out well. haha. but subsequently, ive grown close to u UNINTENTIONALLY and UNEXPECTEDLY. kan kan? i miss that crazy dynn. i got too used to ur irritations that life seemed quite naked without them. and err.. i have to admit, i do miss ur annoying-ness. dahdah. i dont wna get all emotional about this! cya soon if i do. btw, i know this wont change the situation. i just wanted u to know. mhmm.

ayn
i read your blog post. u sounded sooooo like me, do u know that? DOMINANT babies ah. (x haha. anyway, im here to offer u my shoulders and lend u my ears. i might not be one of many of ur closest friends but i thought i shud give it a try. i thot that we are somewhat alike so its easier to connect or some sort like that. and i guess, i get really worried when my frens get all sad and down. who doesnt, kan? haha. i just wna let u know that im always here. if not me, there are sooo many others out there that love and care for u. they'd do almost anything to make things right for u. serious. so, what im trying to say, is that its okay sometimes to open up to others. to feel vulnerable in front of those who care for u. just cry it out. its never easy to box all ur emotions up. but its also never easy to let it out, right? i know too. haha. but what i learnt is that sometimes, it feels reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally good [and i really mean it, really good] to tell someone about it. and that someone just listening to ur every cry, hugging u close and wiping ur tears dry. he/she might not give the best advice but knowing that they're there for u is enough to give u the greatest comfort. (: so i think u shud give it a try.
oh! and yarhh.. i miss u too. DUUHH!


hannah
i just miss everything about u. i miss hanging out with u. i miss listening to all ur craps and then get bored of it. haha. heck, i miss YOU! seriously serious tau. i wished we had more time the other day but im a busy woman, kan? wattado. (x i sayang u, giler babi ah! ure one of the most sincere friend ive ever had. and i dont wna let u go just yet. u can be all annoying and irritating and everything related to that but its never too much. i guess its because ur friendship is worth tolerating them. i miss those times we wud gossip about teachers and boys. non-stop ah! hahaha. oh. and those most random things we wud do just to pass the time. ok. i cannot really rmb one specific one. oops! anyway, u might live sooooooooo near me and yet we hardly meet up. sheeshk! when we look back, we shall blame jc for this. garff. stay hannah ok! dont ever change. rmb! DONT. haha. ure the crappiest, most nonsensical, happy-go-lucky friend i have! plus.. ure signature laughter, i cannot forget, man! keep on dancing, princess gonzuella banana hammick(?).



and i love u all sooooooooo much tauu!
<33
god bless you 'ol.


today
three two and half hours of physics tutorial was aite.
but thats not what im writing here for.
found out that there was a youth seminar in school that involved ALOT of malay ppl from different schools. so i looked through e list.

.
.
.
Nur Farah Binte Abdul Jaafar
Nursyafiqah Binte Mohd Ramlee

*HUGE smile*

called up farah and asked where she was.
omg! when she came down those stairs, my face lit up.
i gave e tightest hug and loudest scream.
then it was syaf cute.
i thot that was that.
then syai called me from behind and i was like 'AAAAAAAAHH!'
another tight hug.
i swear it was one of my happiest moments recently when i saw those familiar faces.


spent the afternoon together.
didnt do much sharing.
we need a proper outing. seriously.
took stupid pictures instead.
will post em up soon.

i cud cry thinking of all those times we spent together.
e kambengs. just e kambengs.
i miss them too much.
seriously, i dont mind leaving what i have now just to relive those memories.
i think its a good trade.
[:

sunday
snow city. i was e selit. i swear, i thot there were more of those OUTSIDE e clique. haii.
but it was much fun(:
oh. it wasnt a just-for-fun outing. to celebrate fir's bday.

reached granny's place almost ten, only to study for 10mins and it was straight to bed!

...


friday
skipped school. met my dear boyfriend in e morning then left to meet e other tpjc-tkgians who also skipped school on that day. i was sooooo excited!
okay. imma cut to e chase.
i saw sooo many familiar effeminate faces.
those of which i missed sooo much.
joanne, shujie, sijie, melissa, chermaine, wee ling, hwee ling, vera, hannah, may, sam, kirstie, mas, farzana, josephine & the list goes on.
not forgetting e teachers - ms tee, mrs tong, mrs loy, ms terry,mdm azizan...
;its heartwarming to know that they still remember me.
ms tee- so what are u in now, yuni? model ah.
(x suuuuuuuuuuure.

i didnt wna let go of the hugs.
i didnt wna stop talking.
i didnt wna stop listening to those lovely voices.
i didnt wna leave them.
i wanted to stop time.

may, she had the greatest impact on me.
ran to me and hugged me so long i got scared for a while.
and i saw those tears running down her cheeks.
i didnt know how much i missed u until i saw u. omg yuni. i miss u so much.
yeah. i missed her too. i think she's enjoying her life.
we talked but it wasnt enuff.

cudnt go out with my girls later on cos i had flight):
so i bade goodbye.
and may ran to me and hugged me.
she even left me a kiss.
that was seriously unexpected.
just goes to show how much we missed the old times.
*sigh*
i was downcasted, i didnt wna leave.

later that night...
discussion at al-ansar.
syafiq and farid had a good laugh.
shall not talk about it.
i hope its not on youtube. /=


thursday

happy 1st month, boyfriend.
((: