Monday, December 26, 2005
signed in to my blogger account.
clicked create under posting.
and then..
i seem to forget all the things i wanted to rant out.
wait. i did not forget the things. its just that i donno
how to.. write it all down.
i cant seem to type it out.
thats why.
i came here. and rant about this instead.
alot of things happened these few days.
but i
-------
school is coming back.
and ill be in secondary four.
the last year. and the most important
year in secondary school.
o-levels.
the big examination.
this will determine where i will go next.
junior college. or polytechnic. and in some cases,
private schools or ITE.
im aiming for the highest,
no doubt about it.
not just for the sake of my family.
but for my own good.
i want to be sure of what i want to be in the future.
i dont want my future to be a blur.
i want to be someone i really wanna be.
but for now, im not sure what i wanna grow up to be.
as much as i want this to be over and done with,
im, at the same time, scared and nervous.
im sure all the others are too.
im scared that i will not be ready when the time comes.
i really wanna do my best.
but the itsy bitsy tiny feeling of not making it
scares the shit out of me. seriously.
i can tell all of you,
at this moment,
i am not ready.
i dont even feel ready.
i just pray to Allah that when the papers' infront of me,
i'll be calm and not panicky. cos i'll be ready
and when reading the questions,
i'll be able to answer them with ease. cos i'll be ready
and when handing in the papers,
i'll feel confident of passing it. cos i'll be ready
by then.
and after all that are done.
i dont have the feeling of guilt
when having fun.
bcos i deserve it.
=))
5 days seems long kann?
hehh.
it started when we were younger.
my boo.
♥ 5:15 PM
